• I want to own a singles bar for lonely middle age men and women. The interior would be drab and bleak and it would be called "Metaphors"
• I want a business that sells handmade tchotchkes to tourists, but the tchotchkes are completely incomprehensible and have nothing to do with the city they are in. Like a snow-globe featuring a freshwater dolphin jumping over a bunch of grapes being lowered into the gaping maw of Barry Gibb, or collectible shot glasses featuring anecdotal evidence to the existence of bigfoot, or science themed t-shirts with antique soda caps sewed into the shape of an eagle on the back and a miniature digital scrolling marquee that says "TIM ROBBINS WAS RIGHT!" and finally keychains featuring a lucky rabbits' foot with doll arms and legs affixed to it and it's wearing a tiny coon-skin cap and holding a tiny musket and it has a tattoo on it's left arm that is a heart with the words "Mom" and "Tacos" in it. Incidentally this business is also called "Metaphors"
• I want to own a lawn and garden store that only sells wheelbarrows. But like hundreds of different kinds. The biggest selection of wheelbarrows on the planet.
12 comments:
i wish/want those things too.
You make my wants seem insignificant.
I love you so hard.
I second that hard love!
Metaphors only go so far, but wheelbarrows... well, they're like a thing that you can carry stuff in forever.
If you sell a wheelbarrow big enough to haul my big fat drunk ass home from the bar, you have yourself a sale.
Big, fat, drunk and ass have me sold.
Sorry all, but ... well OK. Look, we know that what I said before about wheelbarrows was... was a simili. Wheelbarrows aren't like that.
You actually dream of running a retail establishment?
Anthony, you're presupposing that customers will be there. Who shops at a wheelbarrow store man? Think about it.
Owl - Wheelbarrows carry my hopes and dreams man.
Tits/Nads - hard love back at you.
Grant - 'Tis the burden of the man with lofty goals.
Diz - Welcome aboard. You're now the COO of Metaphors, Inc.
Wouldn't that just be a wheelbarrow store then?
Scarlet Hip speaks for us all.
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